


One X

by NoelleLilacNotte



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cas listing happy things, Cas thinking, Internal Monologue, M/M, Nightmares, PSTD, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-22
Updated: 2015-10-22
Packaged: 2018-04-27 14:25:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5051917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoelleLilacNotte/pseuds/NoelleLilacNotte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three Days Grace songfic with Castiel's internal monologue when the Winchester's leave.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One X

*Do you think about everything you've been through? You never thought you'd be so depressed. Are you wondering, is it life or death? Do you think that there's no one like you?*

Castiel sat on a dingy motel bed. The Winchester’s were off hunting a vampire and he had nothing to do. He tried thinking. He didn’t often get the luxury of being able to anymore. Best to try it while he could. His mind recounted all the times he’d almost died, and the few times he did. He could still remember them. He wondered if he was dead now. It wouldn’t be the strangest thing to ever happen to him. He wondered if anyone else could remember their deaths. He wondered if anyone else had ever died like him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*We are the ones, we get knocked down, we get back up and stand above the crowd, we are one.*

He fell backwards onto the bedspread. One of the few good things, he supposed, about being in this form, was that he could lie down properly without the pressure of his wings. It was kind of nice. He smiled slightly, glad that he could still see the small things that made him happy. He was happy he could be happy. He was happy he could still see. He counted a few little things in his mind to help with the sudden sadness that seemed to consume him when he was alone. Sometimes it helped. Food, he thought. Food, Dean and dreams were the things that made him happiest. His consciousness trailed off, leaving him asleep on the bed. He dreamed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*The life I think about, is so much better than this. I never thought I'd be stuck in this mess, I'm sick of wondering “is it life or death?” I need to figure out who's behind me.*

The familiar gray foliage tore at his skin. His clothes shredded and his mind not far behind, he ran. Something was chasing him, something he knew he couldn’t face. He didn’t know what it was. An enormous beast, black like the midnight sky. The monster’s screaming echoed into his soul. His hands ripped through the bushes, thorns slicing away at his skin. He saw a thin band of faint sunlight through the thick brambles, and dove for it. His foot lifted him off the ground and in a moment he was out of the bushes, out of the reach of the monster.   
Instead he was met with a drop.  
He landed on nothing and plummeted downwards, closer and closer into the darkened abyss below him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*We are the ones, we get knocked down, we get back up and stand above the crowd, we are one*

His own terrified screaming awoke him. He clutched his chest, his heartbeat feeling like a hammer pounding into his brain. Nightmares. Again. He should have known he shouldn’t let himself think like that. He stared at the door and wished Dean would come home. He waited for comfort. He knew the hunters would come home. He just had to wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Haha you thought this was gonna be fluffy and cute. Suckers.


End file.
